ashke.nu

Okay, I’ve tried to write a post about this for an hour now, and I end up deleting everything in the end. I don’t really know what I think. It all comes out just wrong. Draft one - too inconsiderate, what if someone gets offended? Draft two - what fluff! Draft three - shit shit shit! Draft four - fuck it, here goes:

I’m sorry these tragedies should happen! I’m sorry many people have died, I’m sorry they had to die at the same time. I’m sorry many people have lost their loved ones. I cannot sympathize much, not because I don’t care but because things like these have never struck me. I’m sorry that this didn’t strike me harder. I’m sorry that you have to suffer. I’m sorry that anyone has to suffer. I’m sorry there is nothing I can do about it!

But. Here goes. People suffer all the time. People die every day. People lose their loved ones every day. People seem only concerned when they can somehow relate to the tragedy. Some hundred Finns are lost in the areas where the tsunami struck, and now the whole country is in an uproar. No one can work, no one can do anything, no one can celebrate anything. All that is on everybody’s lips is, ‘Isn’t it terrible? Don’t you just pity those over there?’ Answer. Yes. Now, can I move on with my life?

I understand that many are destroyed over the fact that these tragedies happened. What I don’t understand is why it has to consume our lives. I said already that I’m sorry that I was not there when it happened. I said I was sorry that this doesn’t touch me in any way, as in no one I know has died or been lost to the tsunami. Can I go on with my life now? Does life not go on?

What makes me even more annoyed is that I feel guilty already about this post. I should not write such things about such a touchy subject. But then I guess anything too fluffy would just not sound like me. People who really know me and have spoken to me about the subject would think I was possessed or something.

My biggest question regarding the subject was, how can it be that it could catch all those people so unawares? How can it be that there are loads and loads of equipment that cost a fortune that can predict these earthquakes? Are these equipment just there for fun, are they not there to prevent from worse things from happening? I know, the earthquake and the tsunami happened in a matter of seconds. But shouldn’t these equipment have warned a lot of people many many many moments before anything aqtualy happened? And here I am again, critisizing innocent people. There still wasn’t enough time, I know. Who am I kidding. So what are these equipment then for? All I could ask for is these things to be prevented, so that people wouldn’t have to suffer! And that I wouldn’t have to have an awful opinion about it.

I’m just trying to rationalize. Rationality concerns me, while when and how one should flag in consideration of a bunch of people in peril and need, does not. My answer is every day. People die every day, are in peril and in need every day. Did I already say that? I’m just trying to ask myself why the whole country has to go on a total stop. Why? Isn’t there anyone I can blame for stopping my life from going on? Isn’t there anyone I can sue for making me write this stupid entry and feeling even guilty about it? Isn’t there anyone I can hit for making me feel I have to write, that it would be horrible and inconsiderate and selfish not to write?

So there you go. I have written a whole lot of things you did not want to read. All this because I tried and tried and nothing came out right. All this because my thoughts are (at the moment) politically incorrect. All this, purely out of my heart at the fastest rate possible, with no consideration whatsoever.

Here’s my rant. I hope that all of you who are consumed by this, in close touch to this matter, know people who know people who might know or do something, have a happy new year, and all the luck to you. Respectfully. If you can spare a moment, go donate a few dolars/euros to the Red Cross. There are people who need it. You might feel better about it, feel involved, and maybe then you can go on with life, knowing that you contributed. You’ll have yet one more thing to discuss with your friends on the subject. Even I, who am now stark raving mad regarding the subject have donated a few euros, Pal donated five (or was it ten?). I hope it will help someone, the little I had to give.

To those REALLY involved: I’m sorry if I offended you. This rant was more towards those who pretend to be involved, or want to be involved for the glory. There is no glory, I know. I wish you all well, and hope that you will overcome this. I hope your family and friends will overcome. May whatever grace there is be with you. Maybe I should have put this at the top.

I’m really exited because I got my Fellowship of the Ring Extended Edition today. Which means my LOTR DVD Collection is done! I now have all three Theatrical Versions AND Extended Editions. I also made a bunch of LJ icons from captures I took of the Fellowship EE-DVD, but I won’t post them until I’ve made a bunch more, which I mean to do on the following week. (So if you’re still reading, look out for that!)

What saddens me is the things I heard people say on the news; they will vote for Bush because they value their safety and that is most important. Why does this sadden me? Because I see no similarity nor connection with Bush and safety. Does opressing other countries, to make them feel even more intimidated and anti-american, does that make Americans feel more safe? I tell you what it is. It’s an illusion of safety. Why? Because the war front is on the other side of the world. This is strictly a political way of making the illusion of safety. If there are problems within a country, take your problems somewhere else. On an outer threat.

I do not deny that America is or isn’t threatened. But if they are, this is strictly out of political choices the leaders have made. If the American politics wouldn’t be so hostile to the outside world, there wouldn’t be an outside threat, not a serious one anyway. And while the United States concentrate their offence on mid-east, they completely miss what happens inside the country. Have you missed it? Have you missed what the offense on other countries has done to the United States on the inside? It’s easy to say, okay, we have problems in our country, but it’s their fault! I’m fat, but it’s McD’s fault. I have cancer, but it’s Malboro’s fault. Is this right? Let’s sue McD’s instead of going on a diet, and stop eating at McD’s. Let’s sue cigarette companies instead of trying to quit smoking. It’s not McD’s who made the choice for you to eat there. Marlboro didn’t make you smoke their cigarettes.

Why do these solution seem better? Easier? Easier they certainly are. Easier to blame someone else for problems within, than to deal with those problems.

So why does this sadden me? Why does Bush’s re-election sadden me? Because Kerry at least promised to try to deal with the internal problems. Bush promised to continue keeping up the illusion of safety.